I’m going to re-write the phatdoggy interview questions for 2008.  Check out past interviews and please make suggestions in the comment section of this post. 

I had the opportunity to sit down with Wally last Friday, the 13th of October. Wally is about 6’3 and has dark hair with boyish features. We sat outside, uptown Charlotte in the late Friday afternoon breeze.  I have known Wally for a while and have had extensive conversation on all kinds of topics.  I really didn’t know how to start so I jumped to the first question on the list.

So what’s your sign?
“Virgo.”

You live in Charlotte right?
“Yeah for a couple years now.”

Do you believe in that stuff? ..  astrology?
“Not really.”

Do you believe in god
“Yes.” (Very serious-like.)

Why?
“While looking off history, proof, the Bible, people have fought wars over religion.  My family always went to church. Gone to church my whole life.”

Short pause.

“Not because I am supposed to but I have done my homework. Based off my homework I made my own mind up and believe without a doubt.”

So when is the last time you had sex?
“Wednesday of last week.”

So 10 days ?
“It will be a while before I get it again. She’s having some female problems. I’m stuck to masturbation for now.”

Well, that answers the masturbation question but we may come back to it.

So when did you loose your virginity?
“At 17 to a girl named Kim, in a car in an elementary school parking lot. She was 16.”

Was it protected?
“Yeah. We did it 8 times all together. She was my first serious girlfriend. We dated 2 years and waited 8 months before doing it.”

How many girls have you had sex with?
“Don’t know.”

Over a 100?
“Yeah.”

What’s the kinkiest thing you have done?
“Threesomes.”

We talking extra guy or girl?
“Both.”

Any same sex experiences?
“Sleeping over at a friend’s. Woke up with him masturbating me—woke up just as I was coming.”

So you masturbate?
“Before moving in with this girl, a couple times a day.  She really doesn’t like it when I do that, so whenever I can discreetly.”

When was the last time?
“This morning.”

Favorite TV show?
“Smallville and then 24.”

Ever been to a hockey game?
“Yeah, like 8 in my life.”

Any drugs?
“Just pot.”

Any interest in doing it again?
“No, I think I’m done.”

Tatoos?
“None.”

How about piercings?
“Not any more. Had two in my left, 1 in my right and my belly button.”

What’s your waist size?
“37—well 38, they don’t make pants in 37.”

Bigest penis?
“A guy in the men’s shower. Must have been a foot long, not even hard.”

What’s your emotional scar?

Short pause.

“I was raped in jail.”

A few more seconds of silence.

Do you want to go into it any more?
“Yeah.”

How long were you in jail?
“Three days once and then for a month.”

What did you do to go to jail?
“When I was 22 I had a party, was still living at home with parents, it got really big, the police broke it up.  Was charged with 8 counts of alcohol to minors. Couldn’t bond out because they wanted $1000 per count so I had to stay in until my court date, 3 days later.”

I didn’t think anything like this went on in jail, just prison?
“No prison is better, jail is the bad one. They put you in a holding cell, and if you’re in more than a day they put you into a second level holding cell, with the bad people.  No games, no TV, was in with 1 guy who had killed someone, another for armed robbery.”

Are you sure you sure you want go on?

“This guy who I guess thought I was good looking, told me to pull down my pants and told me I could make it easy or hard, and everyone here will hold you down.  This guy was disgusting big, fat and like really hairy, and smelled like he had not showered in a week, I mean he really smelled bad.  I remember his name was Forrest.  I told him ‘I’m not going to let you.’ I screamed as loud as i could for the guards.  Then the guys in the cell grabbed me and held me down, they pulled down my pants. I tightened my ass but he started to get it to go in.”

What happened?

“I talked him out of it. Told him I had to go to the bathroom really bad, and that some of these other guys ...”

A long pause and then he starts back.

“He finally said I wasn’t worth it and stopped.”

A few second of quiet pass; the wind is whipping and you can feel it’s October for the first time.

“Prison is so much better, we played games, the days went by fast, people are much nicer, my month flew by.”

So why did you go to prison?

“Long story but for non-payment and missing a court date.”

What’s your shoe size?
“13.”

Favorite soda?
“Dr. Pepper.”

Beer?
“Don’t drink it much but I like an MGD.”

Mixed drink?
Looking a little embarrassed. “Don’t laugh. It’s sort of girly.” Pause. “Pina Colada.”

How about milk?
“Yeah.”

Chocolate milk?
“Oh yeah.”

How about strawberry milk?
“Yep.”

Favorite color?
“Blue.”

How about your childhood stuffed animal?
“Snoopy.”

Are you a dog person or cat?
“Dog, had two dogs growing up—Cleo and a beagle named Snoopy.”

Spam?  The meat, I mean?
“Never tried it.”

How about cell phone stress?
“I like to be in touch.”

Masterbation?  Did we cover this?
“Yeah, this morning, no lube.”

And advice or technique?
“I don’t cum when I masturbate. I keep my self from cumming—too messy, and this has no clean up.”

Does that feel as good?
“Just slightly less.”

So what do you do?
“You know the taint—you know the space between your ass and balls. When I’m close to coming I press down on the sperm tube and keep it from coming out. No clean up. I like to go to sleep right after doing it so I don’t have any mess.”

Somehow the conversation turns to prostates and the mechanics of it all and to my surprise another story comes out.

“My old girlfriend used a dildo on me. Man, it was massive.”

I hold up two fingers attempting to get a general size

“I was surprised how easy it went in.”

Still holding up my hands up, steadily increasing the distance between, trying to get an estimate on just how massive.  It quickly becomes apparent I am not going to get an answer. I return to my note-taking.

“She wanted me to sit on it while she gave me a blow job.”

How did it feel? Good? (Both fascinated and worried what my mom will think when she reads this.) Ever done anything like it again?

“Not really, none of the other girls I have dated has been so adventurous.”

The conversation trails off. The breeze is picking up.

Ready to head back?
“Yeah.”

If you have any question or comments be sure to post them and I’ll pass them on to Wally.

Thanks again, Wally, and a special thanks to Jenny, my good friend and editor. 

This is the seond interview with Heather.  This included the new questions.  The original interview can be found at Original Heather.  Also check out the Photos. 

Where are you located?
Antioch, TN

How old are you?
Now, should you really be asking a girl her age?

What is your sign?
Libra

What’s your occupation?
Project Manager

Do you believe in god?
Yes, many

So tell us about the last time you had sex?
Extremely good!  However, with the partner I have now, I have EXTREMELY high expectations.

At what age did you lose your virginity?
I don’t like that question, so I’ll pass.

What are your top two TV shows?
Hard call—The Daily Show and The Henry Rollins Show

Have you ever attempted or thought about suicide?
Yes

Tell us about your Underpants? boxers, briefs, commando, or those girly things?
Thanks to lower riders and the annoyance of undies showing, commando

Have you ever seen a live hockey game?
Yes

Have you ever done any drugs?  Do you have any favorites?
I was given a “diet pill” when I was younger that had me bouncing off the walls for days.

Do you masturbate?
Yes, but not as much as I used.  I have a partner whose sex drive matches mine, so I can usually get the real thing when I want it.

Do you have any tattoos and or piercing?
Yes and yes.  And I’d like more of both.

Do you have any pets?
Cats, Talyn and Morgie

What is your waist size?
Again, something that you don’t ask a girl!  Why don’t you ask me my bra size?  I would share that!

Who has the biggest penis you have seen?
My current partner.  I was shocked when I first saw it...and then realized that it wasn’t even erect yet.  Oh my!!

What is your emotional scar?
The one that seems to surface the most the emotional scars from my ex-husband.  And I only realized it when he left.  I’m much happier now, but still have to deal with the fall-out of the 10-year relationship.  Body issues, sex issues, questioning my own worth.  You know, the fun stuf.

What is your favorite type of:
Soda?
Diet Mt. Dew

Beer?
Turbo Dog

Mixed drink?
Cranberry Juice and Ruby Red Vodka

Candy ?
I can’t seem to pass up Hersey chocolate

Vegetable ?
Eggplant

Do you like milk?
Only with certain foods, like cake, brownies or PBJ

What’s your favorite color?
It seems to change from time to time.  Lately, I’m leaning toward royal blue

What was/is the name of your childhood stuffed animal?
Zip

What gives you the better feeling forgetting your cell phone at home, or the comfort of having it?
It depends on the day.  Sometimes, it’s very freeing to be unplugged.

Have you ever been arrested?
Nope

Thoughts on SPAM (the meat)
Even if I wasn’t a vegetarian, I’d say I’d question whether it should be consumed by anyone.  And on an episode of Bones, they used it to simulate flesh when trying to recreate an accident where a person was burned beyond recognition in a car and they were afraid the defense lawyer would make fun of that in court.  Now, I’m always going to remember that…

Do you like boys or girls or both?
Well, I LIKE all kinds of people.  But I’m assuming you’re talking about sexual preference.  Boys, but there was a time right after I split with my ex that I considered exploring girls.  But that was before I found out that there are guys who DO like oral sex.

Favorite celebrity and given the chance would you sleep with them.
Johnny Depp and YES

Dogs or Cats?
Cats

Laptop or Desk top?
I have both, but prefer the laptop

Wars or Trek?  (and if you don’t understand this question that’s ok too your just not as big of geek)?
Trek—What’s this Wars thing????

Favorite City?
Boone, NC for purely nostalgic reasons.

 This was the first time the phatdoggy interview was conducted in person.  Normally I just send out the questions and allow everyone to type up their responses.  So while drinking beer in the late afternoon we did the first live interview.  The questions are in different order, we added a few and have a few follow ups.

So thanks Drew and here is the interview best I can tell from my drunken scribbles. 

Age
27

Milk
Sometimes

Chocolate Milk
oh yea

Strawberry Milk
Not so much

Virginity
17 on birthday on the parents floor Turned up the TV

Was it safe
Oh yea and painful she sat on it bent it double.

Masturbation
Constantly

Last time
2 days ago

Color
Used to be forest green

Stuffed Animal
Stuffed rabbit no idea of name

Beer
St Pete

Mixed Drink
Vodka cranberry or gin and cranberry

Soda
Dr. Peopper

Vegitable-
Squash

Yellow or Green ?
wouldn’t green be zucanie

Grew up
Portland NY 650 miles from NYC

Occupation
Video Producer

Biggest Penis
John McGurit .. Showed me his prince Albert

Spam or Not Span
Not so much - In the past

Which causes you more stress forgetting your cell phone or having your cell phone ?
--- I like to forget my cell phone.

Cat’s or Dog
Dog

More than 4 relationships?
Yea

 Two Interviews in one week.  Wow.  Enjoy !

Where are you located?
Behind a computer.. One day, it might just become attached.

How old are you?
19

What is your sign?
West-siyeed.

What’s your occupation?
I’d like to say “student"… but if by occupation, you mean, how do I occupy the majority of my time.. it’s, again, my computer.

Do you believe in god?
I believe in me.

So tell us about the last time you had sex?
It was a pitty fuck.  I was the one doing the pittying.

At what age did you lose your virginity?
14.

What are your top two TV shows?
Will and Grace and CSI: Miami.  All my other shoes have gone off the air… or, you know, I just stopped watching TV.

have you ever attempted or thought about suicide?
Well, duh.

Tell us about your Underpants? (boxers, briefs, commando, or those girly things?)
Boxers.  When I wear anything.  =)

Have you ever seen a live hockey game?
Yep!

Have you ever done any drugs?
Does caffeine count?

Do you have any favorites?
Uh, Caffeine!

Do you masturbate?
I’m 19!  And male! (Read: yes)

Do you have any tattoos and or piercing
Nipples and cartilege.

Do you have any pets?
One dog.  And one sister.

What is your waist size?
I measure in at 26 or 27 inches.. but I typically wear 30”.

Who has the biggest penis you have seen?
9 inches.

What is your emotional scar?
Posh.  Why bother?

What is your favorite type of: Soda?
Mello Yello

Beer?
Don’t drink.

Mixed drink?
Nope.

Candy ?
Skittles.

Vegetable ?
Broccoli.

Do you like milk?
Yes.

What’s your favorite color?
Blue.

What was/is the name of your childhood stuffed animal?
Trotzy